Tales of an unexpected journey
by bastet-sachmet
Summary: [Follow up to "To keep you safe"][Parts from cannon after 5x09] [One Shot Collection] What happened after Neal, Mozzie and Rebecca ran? They traveled all around the world and that's what happened. Neal x Rebecca Neal/ Mozzie friendship.
1. Unconditional

_Disclaimer: We don't own anything. It all belongs to USA Networks and Jeff Eastin. _

_Author's Note: Ok friends, this is for all of those fans who still don't believe Rebecca is a bad one. It's too obvious and there is so much about those "evidences" wrong it would take us pages to tell. We only know there is more about her than the eye meets. And don't worry we won't make her bad. Maybe she will learn some tricks. Who knows?_

_This will be a collection of one shots about the years on the run after the events of "To keep you safe". If you didn't read it before you should read it now.  
As always we love to hear your opinions and ideas. Maybe some can be put into one of the one shots.  
And now a round written sedatives for all those Rebecca fans outside. Let us keep the faith in her sweet nerdy personalty!_

* * *

_**"We both know that Neal will appear here to bring me what I want and to get you back. But I tell you a secret. Everyone of you is wrong when you think I will just let you walk out of here just like that. I will take something from him that is really important to him. He once took quite everything from me and now I will do the same to him. I will break him and you my dear are the key to it. If you want to take an advice don't try to warn him. If you do it I will shoot him in front of you. And we both know it will be easy for me to make it look like you killed him."  
Hagen's words from earlier were still pounding in Rebecca's ears when she could break free from that guy who had been pointing a gun at her head and ran over to Neal. She wished she could vanish the second Neal wrapped his arms around her. Even though she knew that something would happen and she quite expected something like this but when she heard the shot it was a shock. And maybe it was because of that shock she didn't feel any pain at first. Rebecca didn't even realize she had got hit by that bullet until she saw Neal's scared gaze and her disability to keep herself on her feet anymore. Only a second later the pain was hitting her heavily. It became nearly unbearable to breathe. She could hear the whole conversation her in head already with Neal apologizing for putting her in danger but all she heard was him pleasing her to stay with him. But slowly everything in front of her and around her began to fade and became darkness. Rebecca still wanted to tell Neal none of this hadn't been his fault that she had been too careless when she walked into the lion's den ignoring all his earlier warnings. When her world fell completely into the dark she cried out what she wanted to say the most.  
"Neal, don't feel guilty for what happened. It's not your fault. It was planned this way to break you. Please don't blame yourself. It's not your fault at all."**_

"Rebecca, wake up. Come on, look at me. You're having a nightmare. You're safe."  
It took her some moments to comprehend where she was. She looked around scared and finally realized Neal being bent over her and looking worried at her.  
"What...?"  
"It was only a dream. Everything is alright."  
"Where are we?"  
"In our hotel suite in Paris. Hagen can't harm us anymore. It is over."  
Neal pulled her close and stroke gently over her back to calm her down. It worried him to the bone when he heard Rebecca crying.  
"Hey... don't cry. It's okay. Nothing will happen to you. It was only a dream," he softly murmured into her ear, "We're together now and I won't let something happen to you again I promise."  
"It was all my fault. I should have listened to you when you warned me. I was stupid."  
"Becca, that doesn't count anymore. We made it through this mess and now we are free to do whatever we want."  
"I knew what Hagen wanted to do..."  
"What do you mean? There was something you almost screamed while you were having that dream... Becca, what did you know about his plans?"  
"After your phone call with Hagen... he told me that he wouldn't let us just walk out. Because you once took everything from him he wanted to do the same to you and break you. He also said I would be the key to it. When we started to walk away I waited every damn second for something to happen but it felt like time had stopped when I heard the shot. I didn't want to die in your arms cause I knew it would break you. I never forgot what you told me about Kate and ..."  
"That's why you sent me after him to get the treasure back. It wasn't about the goblet or anything else. You thought if I'm not with you when you die I wouldn't think it's my fault."  
"Don't know if it sounds stupid but the last thing I would have seen shouldn't have been you looking at me full of guilt and sorrow. And the thought the treasure would be safe and returned to a museum... it made me feel like my death would have been good for something."  
"Becca...," Neal cupped her face with his hands and softly kissed her tears away, "You're one of the bravest women I know. Only a very few people would have been so self-forgetful in that situation. And that makes me feel much worse for what I did days ago before that incident."  
"What?"  
"I got an envelope with fake evidences to make it look like you would work for Hagen. I have to admit I started to doubt you and I let Jones run a background check on you if something of this could be true."  
"Neal, I've seen that evidence too. Hagen tried to blackmail me with it to make me work with him but I refused. I guess I would have done the same. That bastard knew your weak spots and that you have been betrayed by people close to you. I understand what you did."  
"Really?"  
"I do. Hagen knew how to play you. When he showed me this fake evidence I didn't think about going to prison or something like that. I was worried what you would think about it."  
"I'm sorry I started to doubt you. I should have known better."  
"You don't have to be sorry. It's okay."  
They leaned with their heads together and closed their eyes for a moment.  
"You think you can sleep again?"  
"I hope so. I hope this nightmare won't come back again since I told you now. Maybe it was just a hint of my subconsciousness I should tell you about it."  
"Could be. I'm glad you didn't tell me that day in the warehouse."  
"Why?"  
"I would have shot him without hesitation."  
"Neal, I don't think you would have done that. You're better than that."  
"Why does everyone keep on pretending this?"  
"Because we know you and you never crossed that line."  
"Becca, is there anything else regarding this day you want to tell me?"  
"No, that was all."  
Neal laid back down and pulled Rebecca with him who snuggled up into his embrace and buried her head in the crook of his neck.  
"It's really sad that this is our last week in Paris."  
"I know but we can come back some time later."  
"Really? I mean I'm looking forward to cruise a bit along the Côte d'Azur in three days but..."  
"Let me guess you will miss that small bakery down the street."  
"Why do you mention it?"  
"Because every time you went there I found crumbles of macarons, éclairs and small tartes in the bed."  
"Okay, you caught me but they're so tasty. We need a huge load of them before we leave."  
"You will get them. I promise. Becca, is it okay when you spend some hours tomorrow on your own?"  
"It is but why?"  
"I have to organize some things."  
"Neal, do I have to worry that you're doing something illegal?"  
"No, I'm not planning to steal something. Don't worry. Why don't you make a shopping tour and get yourself some beauty treatment."  
"You have something planned for tomorrow night and that's why I should go shopping?"  
"You're smart and you know me too well."  
"I'm right?"  
"You are."  
"So what's the occasion?"  
"It's a surprise but it contains a romantic dinner and before you ask we're going out for dinner.""So that means lingerie and a dress."  
"If you want to put it that way... yes."  
"So, a romantic dinner? Will you tell me where we are going?"  
"No, it's a surprise. I will let you know tomorrow where we will meet, okay?"  
"After the last few weeks I really hope it will be a nice surprise."  
"I promise it will be."  
"But then I should sleep now otherwise I will need tons of make up to look good enough for a romantic dinner."  
"Sweet dreams, Becca."  
The next day Rebecca left the hotel after breakfast for her shopping tour.  
"So before I start to raid several boutiques, are there any dress codes?"  
"No, just find the perfect outfit for the most unforgettable date of our life so far..."  
"Whoa, sounds like someone is having big plans."  
"I just think you deserve a very special night after all that had happened recently."  
"Okay, you text me when and where we'll meet?"  
"I'll do. Have fun."  
"I hope I'll find something suitable."  
"Even a dress out of paper bags would make you look gorgeous."  
"Aww, hear hear Prince Charming is talking. I think I have to buy myself some glass shoes."  
"But you won't need a carriage that once had been a pumpkin?"  
"No, not all. Okay, see you later."  
They kissed before Rebecca grabbed her messenger bag and left the suite. Neal waited several minutes if she would come back before he picked up the phone to organize some things.

Hours and several boutiques later Rebecca felt like she had tried on over 1.000 dresses and until now nothing had been appropriate in her opinion. She took another glass of champagne that had been offered to her and she sighed quite desperate.  
"I think I will really end up with a dress out of paper bags."  
"Don't get desperate, cherie! We've just started looking. What did you say what will happen today?"  
Rebecca turned around to the saleswoman who came back with some dresses.  
"A romantic dinner but I have no idea where we're going."  
"What do you think about this one?"  
It was a maxi dress with a draped top out of black chiffon and silk with long chiffon sleeves with a print of stylized roses in several colors.  
"If it fits it will be perfect!" Rebecca cheered and put her glass on the table. She grabbed the dress and vanished into changing room.  
"And how does it look like?"  
"Oh my gosh, it is perfect. I love it."  
"Then come out."  
Rebecca stepped out and in front of the huge mirrors.  
"You're right. It is perfect like it has been made for you."  
"I take it. You really saved my day. Now I only need some shoes."  
"We have fantastic black peep toes if you want to try them on."  
"Yeah great. I'm just asking myself what I should do with my hair."  
"Something that isn't distracting from the dress. A romantic up-do would be cute."  
"Had also been my thought. And can you tell me where I find an optometrist?"  
"Oh... I will have a look and tell you. Which shoe size do you have?"  
"US 6 – 6.5."  
"Ah, okay."  
30 minutes and one glass of champagne later Rebecca had left the boutique with her new dress, shoes and the address of an optometrist. She was a bit nervous cause she had never really tried adherent lenses but it was definitely time for change. With her old glasses in her purse she quite felt like a new person. After hours of shopping she really needed some wellness treatment. It was enjoyable to get a massage, a facial treatment along with a mani- and pedicure before she got her make up and hair done. While she got the final touch up on her hairstyle she received a message from Neal where they would meet. Rebecca looked on her watch and realized she would just make it in time to the meeting point.  
"Oh, excuse me. Is it possible to change my clothes here and send those bags back to my hotel?"  
"Of course."  
While Rebecca changed she wondered why Neal wanted to meet her in at the Louvre but he would have his reasons. She paid and took a taxi. She saw Neal already standing there waiting for her. His eyes widened in surprise when he realized she didn't wear her glasses anymore. When Rebecca arrived at his side Neal wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her softly.  
"I see you had a very successful shopping day."  
"Do you like it? It took me hours to find this dress."  
"You look wonderful. And you're wearing contacts."  
"Yeah, it feels a bit strange but I can wear them during my sleep. So, what are we doing here? You said we're having a romantic dinner not that we're taking a stroll through the Louvre."  
"What if...?"  
"Neal, what have you planned? You said it isn't something illegal. I think I'm done with the authorities or other criminals for some time."  
"It isn't. And we're not taking a tour through the Louvre. Just follow me."  
Neal took her by the hand and they started to walk towards the Jardin des Tuileres. Rebecca was in complete awe when she saw the table with the two chairs and a waiter standing there on a grassed area protected by trees and with the Louvre still in sight.  
"I hope you like it."  
"Neal, this is crazy... how did you?"  
"It took me some phone calls but I thought you deserve a very special evening."  
"I don't know what to say... it's like... gosh, I feel like I should pinch myself if this is really happening."  
"I can assure you it is."  
Rebecca nearly jumped into his arms and kissed him again.  
"You're really crazy but I love you for that."  
"I love you too. So we can have dinner?"  
"Absolutely."  
They went over to the table.  
"For how long have you been planning this?" Rebecca asked after they had sat down.  
"Since your arrival here."  
"Really? It is perfect and you couldn't have chosen a better place."  
"I'm really glad you like it here."  
"How couldn't I? You really know how to amaze me every time anew."

The next hours they enjoyed a delicious 5 course dinner.  
"Neal, you absolutely spoiled me. I can't remember that I ever had such a fantastic dinner date like this. You can never outnumber this."  
"But our date isn't over yet."  
"Not...? We're finished with dinner. The only thing that would top this would be a bunch of birds and glowworms singing a romantic ballad like in old Disney movies."  
"Okay, Becca, you had enough wine for tonight."  
"No...," her protest came along with a chuckle, "so what else have you planned?"  
"It's something I had planned to do on another occasion but I decided today would be perfect."  
The nervous edge in Neal's voice and behavior wasn't lost on Rebecca. She wanted to say something but Neal shook his head.  
"Becca, on that evening when I told you the truth about me I said that I didn't expect you that I didn't expect us and it was the truth. I hadn't expected to meet someone like you in my whole life. Even though I lied to you and hid things from you... you never judged about me. You always cared more about who I am than what I am and what I've done. I thought that unconditional and non-judgmental love would only be able for others but not for me. I was about to accept that everything regarding myself would come in handy with the label criminal. No one before had been looking at me like the way you do. Maybe it depends on your job that you don't judge a book by its cover but no matter what it is I'm thankful to have you in my life. You changed a lot in my life without wanting me to change. You accept me as I am and you love me for who I am. This is more I could have ever asked for."  
Rebecca felt her nervousness increasing when Neal went down on his knees in front of her and took her hand in his.  
"Rebecca, this might be too early but you've given up your whole life to be with me. And all I can offer you is my love and the promise to do everything to make you happy and never make you regret your decision. So I'm asking you, Rebecca Lowe, will you marry me?"  
It took Rebecca a few seconds to comprehend what she heard before she quite fell into his arms.  
"Yes, yes, yes, of course I will," she squealed and kissed him.  
"Then I guess you will wear this," Neal said with a smirk and gave her a small jewelery box. Rebecca opened it and she ran out of words. It was a delicate golden ring with wonderful sharpened emerald.  
"Oh my gosh... this is... it is beautiful. But...," Rebecca took a closer look on the ring and frowned, "Neal, is this the golden ring I got from my great grandmother? I thought I lost it ... How...?"  
"Becca, you told me that this was the engagement ring your great grandma got and that she gave it to you when you were a small girl cause you liked it so much."  
"Yes, and one day I lost the gem on it and the ring was so old..."  
"Shortly before Mozzie and I left New York I went to your apartment and got the ring out of your jewelery box."  
"Why?"  
"I was sure that you're the one I wanted to become my wife and I thought it would be the perfect ring for you. So I decided to take it and give it to you when the day comes I'd propose to you."  
"It is even more beautiful than I'd have ever imagined it. My great grandmother had an emerald in it too."  
"Give me your hand."  
Neal took her hand and put the ring on her right ring finger. Rebecca smiled and looked at the ring.  
"Neal, what was your usual plan to ask me?"  
"Promise me you won't laugh."  
"I swear I won't. "  
"It's another surprise I'm giving away but before we arrive in Nizza we make a stop and stay over night at that vineyard you had visited while you were studying in France."  
"Neal George Caffrey, you must be out of your mind."  
"I'm not but why you're asking?"  
"Why you're doing all this?"  
"Because you deserve it and you told me so much about it."  
"I love you even if you wouldn't do all those crazy things. I don't wanna know how you will outnumber yourself when it comes to our wedding."  
"Actually I don't plan to because you once said you already have a master plan for that."  
"Oh, well then... and we're really going to that vineyard?"  
"Yes, it should be a really beautiful place with fantastic wines as I heard."  
"Is Mozzie coming with us?"  
"Yes, but once we leave him at the wine cellar he'll be busy."  
"I guess so...," Rebecca laughed.  
"And we need some wine for our cruise trip."  
Rebecca had to chuckle before Neal cupped her face with his hands and kissed her again.


	2. Rome

_So here the next little piece. It takes place about half a year after the last one. Have fun._

* * *

With a groan Neal got up and searched for his crutches. It was more than obvious they were as far as possible from the bed to prevent him from getting up. He stumbled over till he reached them and finally walked into the huge living area of their recent hide out. No one needed to tell him what was going on because the gentle ringing of little bells told him more than he wanted to know. It was no surprise to Neal to see Mozzie and Rebecca train her in the high art of pocket picking. How in hell Mozzie was able to get a bell jacket so fast was something beyond Neal's knowledge.  
"You are getting better, Becca."  
"But still I hit at least one bell." she puffed annoyed about herself.  
"What the hell are you doing here?" Neal asked angry even if he already knew.  
"As far as I know you still can see so you know what is going on." Rebecca threw back.  
"But why?"  
"Do we really need to explain this?" Mozzie asked also annoyed.  
"Yes, you do. We never wanted her to learn that stuff."  
"That was before a certain bullheaded idiot who is running around on crutches now decided to pull the heist off alone using the one and only catacombs that were open for new building measures."  
"You still want to access that library?"  
"Of course! And you should go back to bed." she glared at him.  
"But how?"  
"How you should go back? You know there is this thing called walking." Mozzie said also glaring.  
"No, how you want to access it?"  
"We found a much saver way but you needed to run ahead." Rebecca only said and made him turn. She guided him back to his bed even if he tried to get away.  
"I just have a concussion."  
"And an almost broken rib, a dislocated ankle and several bruises and scratches. You can be lucky Moz knew which way you headed and we found you."  
"I know..."  
"And now be a good sick conman and stay in bed. Or I make Moz restrain you."  
"I know a lot of knots!" Mozzie threw in. Rebecca bite back a chuckle. Surrendering Neal got back into bed.  
"So will you tell me now?"  
"Will you stay here?"  
"Yeah..." Neal answered like a cranky toddler.  
"Ok, I'll tell you." Rebecca snickered and sat down on the bed next to him, "There is a mask ball in two days where the curator of the library will be the guest of honor."  
"So you train pocket picking...?"  
"Come on you know best what the plan will be know."  
"You get the key card?"  
"Exactly."  
"And this mask ball?"  
"You want to know my disguise?"  
"Yeah"  
"It's a classic one. I will wear a golden mask with white feathers and a white soft empire gown."  
"You already have it?"  
"No, but I found the right one in a store today. I'll buy it tomorrow."  
"Becca! We need to continue." Mozzie called out with an urgent tone.  
"Just a second, Moz."  
Rebecca rolled her eyes and took the crutches away again.  
"You know I will get them no matter what?"  
"I know but at least I can make it hard on you."  
"Becca?" Neal asked in a soft voice.  
"Yeah?"  
"You are good."  
"You think?"  
"Yeah, usually it takes weeks for someone to get that good."  
"I admit I asked Moz to show me when we came here." Rebecca smiled sheepish.  
"Why?"  
"Oh come on, we almost got busted in Naples. I was a question of time when something like this now happens."  
"Becca, when I told you I don't want you to become a criminal I meant it."  
"I know but you also should know that if I join you I will learn some of this stuff. I need to able to take care of myself in case we got split."  
"Like in Naples."  
"Yeah..."  
Neal sighed depressed.  
"You will do this only if we have no other options, ok?"  
"I promise. And if you wouldn't became so stupid I wouldn't need to do it anyway."  
"Yeah just give me a bigger guilty conscience."  
She bent down and kissed him.  
"You will survive it."  
"Just be careful."  
"I am always careful, Neal." she replied with a smile and went back to her training. Neal still was feeling bad about the whole thing and got the really bad feeling this will end bad.  
In the meantime Rebecca tried to get it done right. Mozzie sensed she wasn't full into it anymore and stopped her when she was about to start the next try.  
"What's up, girl?"  
"Neal..."  
"Could you be more precisely?"  
"This suicidal things he pulled off recently."  
"You worry what he would do next and if he will end up in hospital the next time?" Mozzie asked and softly pushed her to the table to sit down.  
"Yes, it seems like he get crazy every now and then and needs to do something incredible dangerous. I don't know how far this will go. Or if I can stand it."  
"Rebecca, Neal won't do something like that again."  
"Are you sure?"  
"Not hundred percent but I am sure he realized he went too far."  
"Did he ever act like that before? And please be honest, Moz."  
Mozzie took a deep breath. In solemn silence he poured them both a tea.  
"He did."  
"When?"  
"When he was looking for Kate. It's a wonder Peter didn't find us by now."  
"You think he tries to get Peter's attention?"  
"Possible. He left without sorting their problems out."  
"Means I have to live with that." Rebecca sighed, "Well then I think I have to train."  
"Don't you want to take a break?"  
"No, we only have two days left."  
"One thing is for sure, you two are stubborn like hell."  
"Thank you." she smiled amused.

Two days later Rebecca was about to get ready. Neal sat at the table and marveled at her while Mozzie hurried around to get their equipment. Rebecca was already wearing the dress. It was a long ivory colored dress with an empire waist. At the waist it was golden and the long sleeves were cut open from shoulder to elbow and from elbow to wrist. The cleavage was wide and went from shoulders to the waist and revealed her light soft skin. She had her hair open and falling ins cascades over her shoulders. The only things that were still missing were her ivory high heels and the golden mask.  
"You look wonderful." Neal said longing.  
"Oh dear Lord get you mind back upstairs." Mozzie scolded him.  
"I am sorry I am marveled by my wonderful fiance." Neal shot back laughing. Rebecca giggled a bit embarrassed.  
"I thought you are used to that."  
"Not that you look like an ancient goddess."  
"The theme for tonight is ancient times. I would say I fit in now."  
"You absolutely do."  
"Ok, one more time. What's the plan?" Mozzie asked Rebecca.  
"I go in, search for the curator, get his key card and bring it to you so you can access the library and get the Michelangelo journal. After that you bring the key card back and I let it slip into his pocket again."  
"Good. Are you sure you want to do that?"  
"Moz, for heavens sake if you ask this one more time I do it all alone."  
Neal just giggled because of them.  
"I have to leave now or we will get in trouble with our schedule." Rebecca told and slipped into her shoes.  
"Becca?"  
"Yeah?"  
"Be careful."  
"I am not you." she teased him and gave him a goodbye kiss.  
"She won't let me live this down, will she?" Neal asked Mozzie.  
"That surprises you? We needed one and a half day to get you out of these damn catacombs. She thought you would be dead."  
"She did?"  
"Yeah but non the less she tried to get to you. You really have to make up a lot."  
"I know..."  
It was late into the night when Neal heard her coming back even if she was barefoot. He couldn't find sleep with the knowledge she was out there doing his job. With a low groan from the pain in his ribs he switched the light on.  
"Oh, you are awake?"  
"Couldn't sleep. How did it go?"  
With a broad smile Rebecca waved with a thick leather journal and threw it on the nightstand.  
"No one even knows what happened."  
"That's great. Where is Mozzie?"  
"Wanted to celebrate our success."  
"In other words he gave us some space, my lovely Venus."

"You lovely Venus needs a back rub." Rebecca chuckled and threw the shows to a side followed by the mask she had to wear and her clutch.  
"I am sorry but..."  
"I know your rib... I need to get out of this dress first anyway."  
"Feel uncomfortable?"  
"Yeah, I mean this cleavage is perfect as distraction but …..."  
"It's not you. Becca?"  
"Yeah?" came the muffled reply under the cloth of the dress.  
"What do you think if we move on after Moz fenced the journal?"  
"Huh?" she blinked surprised.  
"Yeah, you know since we arrived in Italy we only had troubles and I won't be back on track for at least two weeks."  
"Are you suggesting some kind of vacation?"  
"Why not. What do you think about Finland?"  
"I heard it's nice in early summer. But Moz won't be pleased."  
"It's not Moz who I need to make up for my stupidity. I had too much time to think tonight and after what he told me before he left... I am wondering you are still here."  
She let out her breath and fell into the bed next to him. Just in underwear she cuddled up to him.  
"I thought about it."  
"About leaving?"  
"Yeah, the last weeks you behave so extremely stupid. Like you are seeking dangerous situations."  
"I know. I am really sorry. I …..."  
"Shhh" she put her finger on his lips, "As long as you promise me you will stop this it's fine."  
"Really?"  
"Yes, really. You have to see it that way: If you don't do dangerous stuff that gets you injured I don't have to take over your part." she explained snickering.  
"That's a logic I have to follow." Neal chuckled and pulled her close.  
"So Finland?" she asked after some minutes.  
"Yeah, why?"  
"You know, I head the Finns are extraordinary open when it comes to nudity."  
"Really?"  
"Yes, really." she smirked smugly.  
"I think that's the perfect place to recover."


	3. A trip down memory lane

_Author's note: Well here another one shot. Again about half a year later,maybe a little more. We still have ideas and some already finished pieces. BUT it seems like after the last episodes most Rebecca fans don't like her anymore and those who read our previous story don't continue to read our stories so there is the question if we keep this up. We will see what happens._

_And now enjoy the next piece and leave us a review._

* * *

Rebecca sat in a nice Parisian bistro and enjoyed her cafè au lait. The late autumn sun shone and a slight breeze let the leafs dance around like in a ballet. With a sigh she remember the last time she was in France. It seemed like a life time ago even if it was only a little more than a year. She took a sip of her coffee when a shadow fell over her table. With a frown she looked up and saw Neal. His face was a mixture of relieve, worry, insecurity and a hint of anger.  
"I hoped you would be here."  
"We both love the Montmartre." she replied matter of fact.  
"Why did you come here?" Neal asked and sat down opposite from her.  
"You know why."  
"You wanted me to find you?"  
"I needed to know if you will come after me."  
"Why?"  
"Italy, Egypt, Lebanon..."  
Neal sighed and grabbed her hand.  
"Was it that bad?"

_Rebecca ran up and down nervous like hell. They were in Beirut for a week now and Neal wanted to do the most dangerous con of their possible targets. Mozzie and she tried to talk him out of it for two days but it only made him more determined about that. Now the guys were running late and Rebecca knew something must have happen. For an uncounted time she looked at the clock. Only moments later Mozzie came back with a face like someone died.  
"What happened? Where is Neal?"  
"Stuck in a net. The owner knew someone was coming and let nets put in the middle of the streets all around his house."  
"They got him."  
"Yes, but I have the painting. With a little luck he can play the lost tourist card and will be out in one or two days."  
Rebecca fell onto the chair next to her.  
"I can't believe it."  
"Becca,he will be out soon."  
"And will continue like this. He promised me to stop doing such dangerous heists."  
"I begged him to do another job but..." Mozzie trailed off and sat down next to her.  
"But?"  
"He wanted to do this one because the piece is more valuable than the others."  
"He did this because of the money?"  
"Yeah, it seemed so."  
"Why? We have more than we can spend."  
"But a lot gets lost with all those aliases and hide outs."  
"But non the less..."  
"I know. Is there anything I can do for you?"  
"No, you can't."  
A little later Mozzie was sound asleep. Rebecca looked around with a sigh and grabbed her bag. A note on the table was left for Mozzie before she left with everything that belonged to her. She took the next flight to Paris using the first alias she got from them. She knew Neal would find her that way if he really wanted to. The whole flight she asked herself if Neal loved the thrill more than her. Rebecca started to ask herself why she decided for this kind of life even if she still loved Neal like in the beginning but she didn't know if this would be enough if he kept on going like this._

Neal saw Rebecca was spaced out a bit and pressed her hand to get her attention back to him.  
"Becca?"  
"Yeah?"  
"You wanted me to find you, don't you?"  
"Yeah..."  
"Why did you left if you wanted to get found?"  
She looked around with a small smile.  
"I needed to get back."  
"Back? You want to go back to your old life?" Neal asked hurt.  
"No." she shook her head with a smile, "I need to go back from where we started."  
"You want to start anew?"  
"It's more about finding out if it will be enough."  
"What should be enough?"  
"My love for you. Neal, when ever you pulled those incredible dangerous things off I don't understand why you do this. We don't need the money so desperate."  
Neal switched into the chair next to her and took both her hands. For a moment he looked down at their hands before he locked eyes with her. Rebecca was astonished by the sudden wave of emotions she saw in his eyes.  
"Rebecca, I love you and this will never change. I thought you ran from me …... I..."  
"You thought you turned me into another Kate." she sighed knowing, "I was afraid you would think this but..."  
"You aren't her. I have learned this long ago. You are here with me and I hope this will never change."  
"It won't but I can't stand worrying so much. Not every time, week for week. It will make me crazy. Moz said you wanted to do it because of the money. Is this true?"  
"It is."  
"But I thought it wasn't always about the money?"  
An amused spark sneaked into Neal's eyes.  
"No, but I don't plan to keep on living like this."  
"Being on the run?"  
"Yeah. You remember our short stay in Istanbul?"  
"I do." she smiled.

_It was early morning and Neal couldn't sleep anymore. After he recovered from his little catacombs incident he itched to pull something off no matter how small it was. The last weeks Rebecca took over his part in their cons and it annoyed him. Mozzie already found a promising job for them in Israel and Neal was glad to get back to what he could do after he felt like a burden for weeks. With his eyes open he stared at the ceiling the sleeping form of Rebecca cuddled up to him. When the sun had set almost completely he tried to untangle himself from her to get them breakfast.  
"Where you going?" she mumbled sleepy.  
"Getting breakfast. Go back to sleep."  
"Can't sleep without you."  
To prove this she cuddled closer.  
"If you don't let go we won't get breakfast."  
"Mozzie can go."  
"It's my turn today."  
With a sigh she let him go and got up herself.  
"I come with you."  
"You don't need to."  
A giggle was the answer and she got dressed. A short time later they went down the road holding hands to get to the bakery Mozzie found the day before. Children of all ages came past them on their way to school. Halfway down the road they had to stop to let them pass the smaller part of the road. While the children continued their way Rebecca watched them with a sigh.  
"What's up?" Neal asked concerned.  
"Nothing."  
"I know this sigh. What are you thinking?"  
"Just wondering about something."  
"Tell me?" he smiled curious at her.  
"It's just..." she started but didn't know how to put it in words. Her gaze went back to the children. Neal followed her gaze and got a solemn smile.  
"You think about having kids?"  
"Yeah, I know it's stupid right now but …..."  
"With the prospect of going back to New York it's not."  
"Not?" Rebecca asked for confirmation.  
"No, it's not. And I can't imagine someone better than you for being a mom."  
"I don't know. We would go back to a regular life and..."  
_"_You will miss the adventure?" Neal teased her.  
"Very funny. I wanted to say we won't have it for the next two years."  
"Then we have to wait."  
"We?" she questioned snickering.  
_"_Yes, we." Neal confirmed serious but with a smile in his eyes.  
"Until then we have to make sure Moz won't get cranky because he doesn't get breakfast."  
"It's like a parenting trainings camp with him sometimes."  
"Tell me!" she laughed and pulled Neal with her further to the bakery._

"So?"  
"What?" Rebecca shot back with a smirk.  
"You have your answer."  
"I have?"  
Neal nodded with a waiting expression. Suddenly it hit her like thunder striking.  
"Oh Neal you damn idiot."  
"Idiot?"  
"Yes, you risk your life for building up savings for something we still have time for."  
"It's never to early."  
"Neal, I´d rather live in a shabby little apartment raising half a dozen little culprits the Caffrey kind than knowing you rot somewhere in a shabby dirty prison cell in some country that's known for bad prisons."  
"Like Lebanon?"  
"Yes, like Lebanon."  
"So maybe I should leave the dangerous cons for countries with good prisons?" Neal joked and got smacked by her.  
"If you only dare to think about it I will pull your incredible sexy butt to the next police station."  
"You know that's a weird logic."  
"Not really."  
"Not?"  
"Of course I will make sure Moz and I can get you out any time."  
"What means I will probably rot there."  
"Why?"  
"Mozzie is angry with me because you left."  
"What?" Rebecca asked laughing wholehearted.  
"Yeah, he says once in a lifetime a guy like us meets someone like you and I manage it to make you run."  
"Au contraire, mon frère. I said you are lucky to have her and also stupid like a suit to make her run." Mozzie corrected with a smile.  
"I should have known you are also here." Rebecca smiled and hugged him.  
"How could I miss Montmartre? And you really can let him walk around freely. Sometimes I think the suit hadn't the worst idea with the anklet."  
"Maybe we can get one that shocks him every time he is about to do something stupid."  
"It would only provoke cardiac incidents." Mozzie shook his head.  
"Thanks for worrying about my health." Neal said a little worried about those ideas.  
"Always at your service."  
"I already have some scars from that stupid anklet."  
"Aww, poor Neal. Maybe we should have stayed a little longer in Finland. I liked that cabin with the lake in front of us."  
"Oh please not!" Mozzie cried out desperate.  
"What's wrong?" Neal asked because he had no idea why Mozzie was against it.  
"Nothing." Rebecca and Mozzie said at the same time but her smile told Neal there was something he didn't know.

_It was the third week in Finland and Neal finally was back to almost full health. To celebrate that they decided to rent those cabins in the middle of nowhere. Rebecca immediately had fallen in love with the lake only a few feet away from their patio.  
Neal and Rebecca used their time alone since Mozzie was grocery shopping and to enjoy this little freedom Neal and Rebecca decided to take a bath in the lake completely nude. They lost track of time. After a while Rebecca went inside again to get some snacks and walked into the kitchen without thinking about wrapping herself into a towel or something. She stood in front of the open fridge when Mozzie came walking in.  
"Hi, Becca. How is Neal doing?"  
The next thing he heard was the noise of the milk bottle falling to the ground.  
"Oh my god, Moz, I thought you were in town?"  
"I was gone for four hours." he replied reproachful.  
"Oh …... uhm …... could you please turn around?"  
_"_Why?"  
"Because I don't wear anything."  
_"_Why don't... oh forget about that."  
Mozzie turned around.  
"Go, little Red Ridding Hood. I won't peek."  
Like a whirlwind Rebecca ran past him and went into the bedroom she shared with Neal. The only thing Mozzie saw was her backside when he turned again to put away the groceries.  
"I understand why he is so much into her." he mumbled to himself.  
"Did you say something?" Rebecca yelled.  
"No."_

"Mozzie!" Neal scolded him.  
"What? If you two wouldn't think the lake was your personal love playground it wouldn't happen."  
"It wasn't our love playground." Rebecca disagreed blushing.  
"I am not so sure about that." Mozzie chuckled.  
"This isn't such a bad idea." Neal said thoughtful. Again he got smacked by Rebecca while Mozzie looked at him with a death glare.  
"One thing is for sure. I will make sure we have different hiding spots for the rest of this adventure."  
"Why?" Neal asked making fun of Mozzie.  
"Because I already witness way to much between the two of you." he motioned with his hands manically between them.  
"Before you start to make plans..." Neal turned to Rebecca again, "Becca?"  
"I know what you want to ask, Neal."  
"And?"  
"This time for real. No more stupidly dangerous heists or cons. We will find other ways to get our fiances done later."  
"Later?" Mozzie asked curious, "What later?"  
"Later when we are back home."  
"Ah New York... I really miss it. Well I would suggest after we have no real plans. What about New Zealand?"  
"You still want to see the place where they made " Lord of the Rings", don't you?" Rebecca teased him snickering.  
"Of course, my lovely elven maid."  
"Did he had wine today?"  
"Not a single drop." Neal told her also snickering.  
"I guess that's the problem."  
"Did you know the Montmartre has it's own vineyard? I bet they have some of this wine here." Mozzie grabbed the menu. Rebecca smiled over at Neal. Both knew they got a chance that wasn't for granted and let Mozzie order some wine for all of them.


	4. Inconvenient truth Part 1

_Well here we go with the next one. Actually this is a two parted one shot. After 5x10 and the discovery Rebecca is a MI5 agent this idea came up. This is too good to let it go especially because it gave us a fantastic reason to do something in the sequel of this one shot series. So here our take on how Neal finds out about it.  
Oh and for those who wait for a one shot about last weeks episode. We are working on it. Please be patient. _

* * *

"Come on, Becca, we want to go," Neal hurried her.  
"I am not hungry," she replied standing in front of the window of their hotel room.  
"What's up with you? You hide here since we arrived in Frankfurt."  
"Nothing, I am just no feeling well."  
"It's still about what happened in Lebanon?"  
"No...," she turned around with a sad smile, "It's not about what happened."  
"So?"  
"I... I guess I am coming down with something."  
"We can order from the room service," Neal suggested and pulled her into an embrace.  
"Maybe I do it later. You and Moz need to get out before you go crazy. He is probably waiting impatiently for you downstairs."  
"You really don't want to join in? Some fresh air could help."  
Rebecca looked down to her feet and took a deep breath.  
"Why not? You are right," she gave in.  
"Great. We wait downstairs, ok?"  
"Sure..."  
With a last thoughtful glance at her Neal went down to meet Mozzie in the foyer. His friend was already running up and down.  
"There you are, Neal. What took you so long?"  
"Becca..."  
"She doesn't come with us again?"  
"No, she comes but..."  
"She is acting weird since we came here," Mozzie finished the sentence.  
"She does and I don't think it's a cold."  
"She is hiding something."  
"I hoped you wouldn't say that." Neal frowned.  
"You have no idea?"  
"No, she just acts strange. She is jumpy and refuses to go outside."  
"Maybe it's because of the recent events."  
"What do you mean, Moz?"  
"Maybe she still needs to arrange herself with being back to the way we used to work. She did a lot of your parts the last months."  
"We will see. I would like to know what's wrong with her."  
"She will talk to you when she is ready, mon frère."  
"Or when it's too late."  
A few minutes later Rebecca came down. Both men realized she looked very pale and uncomfortable.  
"Sorry you had to wait."  
"It's okay. Let's go out and find something nice for lunch."  
Neal took Rebecca by her hand and it worried him he quite had to drag her behind them.  
"There is a very fantastic Vietnamese restaurant not far from here."  
"Sounds good. What do you think, Becca?"  
She only nodded and put her sunglasses on when they stepped outside.  
"Becca, it's pretty cloudy today. Why the sunglasses?"  
"I have a serious headache."

On their way to the restaurant they did some window shopping. In front of an antique store Mozzie got pretty excited.  
"Let's go inside."  
"I thought we wanted to go for lunch," Rebecca said annoyed.  
"Just a few minutes."  
While Mozzie went into the store Neal and Rebecca waited outside. He pulled her close and looked at her.  
"Is really everything okay?"  
"Yes, I'm not feeling well the last days. It's nothing serious, Neal. Don't worry."  
"Becca, you know you can tell me everything if something bothers you."  
"I know but it's nothing. I guess the last weeks had been a bit tough on me. And it's strange here."  
"Why?"  
"I understand why they call it little Manhattan but it makes me miss New York so much."  
"I know. I feel the same but let's enjoy our time here."  
"I try to..."  
Neal cupped her face with his hands and kissed her.  
"Go and follow Mozzie inside," she added with a slight chuckle.  
"Why?"  
"I saw that you looked with a longing on these old cuff links."  
"You know me way too well."  
They kissed again before Neal turned around.  
"Don't you want to come inside too?" he asked at the door.  
"No, it's okay."

As soon Neal had vanished into the store Rebecca took a deep breath when she saw that man crossing the street coming towards her.  
"Rachel? What are you doing here?"  
She frowned because she hadn't heard that name for years.  
"Steven, just leave. Those times are long gone."  
"Are you having a new assignment here? You went back? I haven't heard from you in ages."  
"I won't tell you. I left that life behind me a long time ago. I paid the price for it and it took me long enough to get a normal life. Go and don't tell anyone you saw me here. By the way what are you doing here?"  
"If you would be a real civilian I couldn't tell you but I'm here for an assignment with the BND. We're suspecting some salafists to plan assaults."  
"Well then good luck with that."  
"Rachel, we could really need someone with your knowledge for those operations."  
"I burnt all my aliases. When I got into trouble I wanted them to help me. Do you know what they did? They tried to trade my head and left me. I was accused of being a double agent like I would have betrayed the Empire and the MI5. You never asked yourself why I vanished in an instant? Just forget that you saw me here. I have nothing to do with them anymore."

"Neal...?"  
"What's up, Moz? Did you find something interesting?"  
"Yes, but it's not antique. Do you know who this guy is talking to Becca?"  
"What?"  
"Looks they're arguing about something."  
"Maybe that's why she refused to go out."  
"An ex boyfriend?"  
"She never told me she was in Germany at some point in her life. I need to check that."

"Rachel, you can't run from who you are."  
"I was never happy to be that person. Being her was like being a slave."  
"And you think you're free now? I saw your scared look when I crossed the street. You're running from your real self. No matter how many bridges you burn a part of you will always be Rachel Turner."  
"Becca, is everything okay?"  
"Neal..."  
When she turned around with an audible sense of shock in her voice Steven took the chance to leave unnoticed.  
"Who was that guy?"  
"Uhm, no one... just being stupid and trying to annoy me..."  
"He called you Rachel. Do you know him?"  
"He was mistaking me for someone else. No, I've never seen him before. I don't feel well, Neal. I think I better go back to the hotel to catch some sleep."  
"Rebecca, wait. Talk to me. What is wrong?"  
"Nothing. This was just too much for me today. I... just enjoy your lunch. We can talk later."  
Neal tried to grab her arm but Rebecca turned around and quite ran away.  
"What was happening?"  
"Moz, I have no idea. Something has tipped her off."  
"Who was that guy?"  
"I don't know but he called her Rachel and it looked like they know each other. I need to talk to her."  
"Neal, you know how stubborn she can be. If you follow her now she won't tell anything. Just give her some time to calm down."  
"Maybe you're right."  
"We get some food now and she brigets her favorite dish later."  
"It's for the better I guess."  
"It is and now let us go," Mozzie pushed Neal down the street.  
"Mozzie?"  
"What now my friend?"  
Neal stopped and nodded towards a man ahead of them.  
"That guy talked to Becca."  
"You want to confront him now. I don't think this is a good idea."  
"Why?"  
"Because it shows you don't trust her and probably she is right and the guy mistook her for someone else."  
"Moz, they were talking English..."  
"So?" Mozzie tilted his head.  
"Have you met a single German outside the hotel who speaks proper English without their particular accent?"  
"Doesn't mean there aren't some."  
"He had a British accent."  
"Ok, that's a go. Why didn't you say that earlier?"  
Upset he followed Neal but both stopped after a few steps because the guy was gone.  
"I didn't expect that."  
"Me neither, Moz. It's enough. I want an answer."  
"Neal, we just talked about it," Mozzie yelled after his friend but Neal didn't listen, "Well this means take out for three."

Only a little later Neal arrived back at the hotel. When he stepped into their room he thought they got robbed because everything laid spread and messed up on the ground.  
"Becca?"  
She didn't react but he could hear some noises out of the bathroom. Carefully he crossed the room and pushed the door open to find Rebecca sitting on the ground crying. He knelt down in front of her.  
"What's wrong?"  
"Everything...," she sobbed.  
"Is it about that guy from the antiques shop?"  
"Yes...no... I can't stay."  
Rebecca got up and tried to get past Neal but he held her back.  
"What?"  
"It was stupid. I should have known better."  
"Known what better?"  
Rebecca broke free and started to gather her clothes. Close to lose his patience Neal followed her and made her stop.  
"Talk to me, Becca."  
"You won't understand. I don't understand myself. I was stupid. I got taught better than that."  
"Taught? What are you speaking about?"  
Rebecca threw a shirt into her bag and sighed. With a serious face she looked up to Neal.  
"I wasn't always the nerdy bookworm you fell in love with."  
"I don't get it," Neal told clueless and worried.  
"You don't have to. I am sorry, Neal."  
"Sorry for what?"  
"I have to go. This is goodbye."  
"What? I thought we are back for good. I promised you to never do something stupid and careless again."  
She went around the bed and kissed him.  
"It's not about you. It's about me. I thought the time of hiding was past but I was deadly mistaken. I am sorry. I am not who you think I am."  
"Who are you then?"  
He felt a pinch at his arm but ignored it.  
"I am Rachel Turner, a well trained retired MI5 agent.  
Neal felt how everything got blurry and stared at her wide eyed in confusion and hurt.  
"What...?"  
"I love you. It's better that way."

With the mother of all headaches Neal woke up again. Confused he looked around. The room was still a mess, Rebecca was gone and someone knocked on the door with impatient knocks.  
"Neal? Becca? Are you ok?"  
With a groan Neal got up and opened the door.  
"What took you so long? I was close to break in. Where is Rebecca? And why is the whole room looking so...?"  
"She's gone, Moz."  
"Did you have a fight?"  
"No, she...uhm, she sedated me and then left."  
"Why?"  
Neal sat down on the bed and shook his head.  
"What happened?"  
"She said she isn't who I think she is."  
"I don't get it."  
"She isn't Rebecca Lowe. She said her name is Rachel Turner and that she's a retired MI5 agent."  
"What?" Mozzie shrieked, "Mon frère, I think she must have heavily drugged you. You're ridiculous. Rebecca is an agent for the British Empire?"  
"She said so."  
"Are you sure?"  
"I wasn't dreaming it. She conned us, everyone of us."  
"So that guy who approached her could have been another agent?"  
"I don't know. Damn, my head hurts."  
"But I vetted her. How could she...?"  
"Moz, if she worked for the MI5, she knows how to put up a perfect vita no one ever would get suspicious about. I don't know why she did this."  
"Did we ever do something that might got them...?"  
"I don't know and it doesn't matter anymore. Rebecca, …, Rachel or whoever she is... she's gone. We should also leave. We don't know if she's onto us or anything else."  
"Neal, if she would be on an assignment to hunt us down she had plenty of opportunities to get that done. And you said yourself she mentioned she's retired."  
"I can't believe she did this."  
"What? Sedate you? Maybe we've told her too many stories about how weird you behave when you got drugged."  
"It's not the time for jokes. I mean, she lied to me all the time. She looked into my eyes and told me she loves me. And I never got the suspicion she conned me."  
"Maybe because she didn't con you. Neal, if she's a retired agent it is understandable she uses another name."  
"I've been so stupid. I felt bad I didn't tell her the truth about me from the start and apparently she knew who I was all the time and she never dared to come clean to me."  
"We can't be sure she knew. You remember? June and I were at her apartment and I looked closer there was nothing out of the unusual."  
"You really think she would keep evidence so close?"  
"You've got a point. What now?"  
"We also grab our stuff and leave."  
"Why?"  
"Because she knows we are here."  
Mozzie wanted to say something but saw everything he would have had to say would fall on deaf ears.

Rebecca sat in the train to Moscow in front of her laptop. For a thousandth time she wanted to write Neal an e-mail to explain herself but couldn't bring herself to type a single word. Whatever she wanted to say she knew Neal wouldn't read it and less believe she was telling the truth. She simply stared at her desktop picture showing the three of them in front of the Eiffel tower. With tears in her eyes her mind wandered off.

"_Rachel Turner?" a middle aged man called out. She got up cuffed like a high security criminal flanked by two of her former colleagues. They guided her into the huge room her trial should take place even if she knew it was all a farce. Her mentor sat next to her handler and both men looked sad and disappointed. She couldn't help herself and smiled. They taught her to trust no one except them and now they were the reason she ended up there.  
"Rachel Turner, you have been charged with treason, selling confidential information to several enemies of the British Empire and corruption. Do you want to speak up in defense?"  
"What ever I have to say doesn't matter," she spoke strong with a glance to the people she trusted. She still didn't know who of them had traded her head but she was sure it was only a matter of time till she found out.  
"Your hearing will be in one week from now. Be prepared."  
She was brought to a cell. Some minutes later her assigned partner came to her.  
"What do you want, Michael?"  
"I wanted to tell you I know you got framed. I try to find something to clear you."  
"You won't find it. I know who did it and you won't get them."  
"Who?"  
"Those you learn to trust."  
"The new family?"  
"However you want to put it," she sighed and fell onto the small bed.  
"Why do you know it?"  
"The only logical possibility. They assigned me to that operation and sent me without back up."  
"It was a set up."  
"That's why you are the analyst."  
"Hang on, Rachel. We will get you out."  
"Good luck, Mick. You will need it."_

_Three weeks later she was back in the United Stares, her name cleared, her mentor arrested and charged for so many things it was hard to keep track and she retired with an nearly unused name. She didn't care why they gave her one of her old aliases for her new life. Probably to make her remember where she came from. But now she sat in her New Yorker apartment and was ready to forget about Rachel. With a broad smile she looked at her mirror image showing her new self._  
_"Hi, I am Rebecca Lowe."_

The train stopped with a hard break and Rebecca hit against the little table in front of her.  
"Damn, what's that about?"  
Like the other passengers she looked through the window to see if she could see the reason for this stop in the middle of nowhere. An announcement came through the speakers but she couldn't understand it since it was Czech.  
"Excuse me, could you tell me what happened?" she asked a fellow passenger but got only a weird gaze in response.  
"Something blocks the way," a man two seats away explained with a heavy accent.  
"Great, just what I needed."  
Annoyed she fell back into her seat and prepared herself for a long night. The next moment a bright light broke through the night. Confused how help could be there so fast and suspicious about it Rebecca packed her stuff ready to leave in case she needed.  
"Rebecca?"  
She froze in panic the moment her name got called out.  
"Rebecca Lowe? I know you are in there. Please come out."  
Her panic got smaller when she realized it was Mozzie. She only asked herself if Neal was there too. A part of her hoped it the other one scolded her for becoming so weak. The passengers in her wagon looked at her because they realized it could only because of her.  
"Becca, don't make it more complicated. I will stand the whole night here till you come out."  
With a sigh she got her stuff and went to the door. She climbed out of the train and was ready to rip Mozzie's head off.  
"Mozzie you frickin' idiot!" she yelled towards the light.  
"Could say the same about you," he chuckled and switched off the light.  
"Yeah but I didn't make such a mess," she growled angry.  
"If you would only know."  
"So?"  
"Neal …"  
"I don't want to know. I left and I have my reasons."  
"He told me and I did a little digging. You left them over three years ago."  
"Since you already know everything I can go back and take my train," she turned on her heels but the train just started to roll again.  
"I am sorry, girl, I can't let that happen and I prefer not get killed by you," Mozzie said with a slight panic.  
"Moz, that's futile. I made my decision."  
"Why didn't you tell us?"  
"Yeah, great start. 'Oh Neal, I don't mind you being a criminal because I am a retired MI5 agent who gut suspected of different crimes against her country.' You both would have run as fast as you can thinking I work with the FBI or someone else."  
"You are probably right," he climbed down the pick up and sat down on its cargo area, "But it wouldn't hurt Neal so much like it does now. He locked himself up in his hotel room in Budapest."  
"He would be hurt no matter when or how I would have explained it. I didn't think about it till I met that former colleague in Frankfurt. I was Rebecca and it quite felt like I had never been anyone else."  
"And suddenly you were reminded you weren't it your whole life. The reality caught up on you."  
"You seem to be familiar with it. How did you find me?"  
"Sweetheart, you may be trained by the British Empire but I am trained by spending my life on the street since I was twelve. You can't hide from me," Mozzie said and shook his head, "Okay and you made it easy for me. Using anagrams of your name wasn't the smartest move."  
"What did I do?" Rebecca blinked surprised.  
"You didn't realize it? Well Freud would say you wanted me to find you."  
"Maybe."  
She climbed up and sat down next to Mozzie.  
"You know I can't come back no matter how much I would love to."  
"You can if you want. Why did you retire?"  
"Neal isn't the only one who got deceived and betrayed by those he trusted and loved."  
"Your mother wasn't a civilian."  
"No, she retired before she met my father but the moment she knew about me she decided I should follow her footsteps. Because of my dad we moved every few years. I got sent to self defense classes as soon as I was old enough. While he only wanted to be sure I was safe and taught me what I needed to know to take care of myself, my mom always kept it in the back of her mind what I should learn to be valuable for the agency."  
"Sounds like a weird childhood."  
"You have no idea, Moz. I always felt like a slave or servant until I retired. I pushed my real past away so hard I really forgot about it."  
"Until a week ago."  
"Yeah..."  
"You need to talk to Neal."  
"I can't. You can't fix a broken heart. He won't want me now or later."  
"Because you had to kill."  
"I am not proud of it."_  
_"If you would be you would be still working for them."  
"Not after what they had done."  
"Why didn't you tell after we started running?"  
"How? Neal would have pushed me away then. I knew he deserved the truth but I couldn't. Living this life as Rebecca Lowe allowed me for the first time to really fall in love and be loved in return. What Neal told me about his past and growing up in Witsec... it was... I felt... I understood so good this feeling of being lost and not knowing who you really are... I messed up. He won't forgive me. Please drive me to the next train station. He's better off without me."  
"And then? Neither you nor Neal will be happy."  
"I'm used to this. I know how to survive out there."  
"So does Neal but I'm afraid he will do some stupid things to get over you."  
"I think it can't get more stupid than the things he pulled off the last months."  
"You have no idea. Come with me. I'll bring you to him and you explain everything."  
"Neal won't listen to me."  
"You don't know that. As you said at least he deserves the truth. And if he wouldn't love you he wouldn't be so devastated since you left."  
"How bad is it?"  
"Well I think he knows every wine cellar in Budapest right now."  
"He is drinking?"  
"Mostly or silently brooding."  
"You think he would listen?"  
"We can try."  
"You won't let me go unless I talked to him?"  
"No," Mozzie smiled broadly.


	5. Inconvenient truth Part 2

_So the second part. This was written before last weeks episode. Strangely it happened that Neal behaves like a jerk here like he did in the last episode. Strange things happen. lol _

* * *

Around early afternoon the next day they arrived in Budapest. Rebecca couldn't enjoy the beautiful view in front of her because her mind always drifted up to times she thought she forgot. Mozzie told her to sleep but she couldn't the whole way they had to drive. Feeling like chewed on and spat out and looking like close to death Rebecca stumbled out of the pick up with stiff limbs.  
"You're ok?"  
"Yeah, only stiff from the drive, Moz."  
"You want to go to him now or do you want to catch some sleep?"  
"I won't sleep the next days anyway," she marched towards the entrance of the little hotel. Mozzie followed her and silently hoped Neal wouldn't shut down completely. He led her to the room Neal got and knocked.  
"Who's there?" came the slurry question. Rebecca took a deep breath.  
"A friend."  
Nothing happened for long seconds till the door swung open with a violent force.  
"See who's there. The con artist of the year," Neal almost spat at her.  
"Neal..."  
"What? Did you come back to finish your job?"  
"Get sober and stop pitying yourself," Mozzie pushed Neal back into the room.  
"So you turn your back on me too?"  
"No, I try to make your drunken life better."  
"Can I please explain?" Rebecca asked desperately.  
"You had your chance but you decided to leave without it."  
"I was scared."  
Mozzie closed the door and took position in front of it.  
"You are nothing than a liar, Rebecca … oh wait, no... Rachel or whatever name you prefer. You used me and didn't have the guts to tell me after I came clean to you."  
"Because you would have reacted the way you do now!"  
"Easy to predict, wasn't it?"  
Rebecca closed her eyes. She shook her head and clenched her fists.  
"I was a slave to Rachel. I worked so hard to become Rebecca for real. To feel free... now I realize I never will be free."  
"You don't know what it means to be a slave. Having only a small radius is a life as a slave."  
"No, you don't understand. You still had the right to decide. I had to follow orders since I was a child."  
"I am really sorry for you," Neal replied with cynicism.  
"No, I am sorry for you. You think you know everything but you don't know anything," she told in a whisper, "You don't know how much love can hurt."  
She turned around and wanted to leave but Mozzie kept his place.  
"No, I won't go."  
"Moz, I don't want to hurt you."  
"Instead you two hurt each other."  
"That's my final warning," Rebecca told her firm.  
"And what then? Will you kill him just with your hands?" Neal asked angrily.  
"No! You think I enjoyed killing? Is this what this is about?" she turned around angry.  
"Tell me. How many did you kill?"  
"I don't know."  
"How many?"  
"I don't know for heaven's sake! I hated it!"  
"Why did you do it then?"  
"Because I had to... I had the order to kill!"  
Both had been yelling at each other. To admit she had to kill in the name of her country was too much for Rebecca. She felt exhausted and she let herself sink to the ground and started to sob. Mozzie moved from the door and tried to comfort her.  
"I had to do it. I didn't want to. I am not made for that life."  
"You are the lousiest agent I ever met," Neal said a bit softer.  
"I know..."  
"Neal, stop it. You both haven't slept for a while," Mozzie stepped in. With a thoughtful expression Neal turned towards the window.  
"You conned yourself, Becca."  
"Involuntarily... I just wanted to be happy."  
"It must have made you very happy to con me all the time, playing me for a fool."  
"It wasn't like that."  
"Why did you come to New York? Why did you target me?"  
"It was nothing like that. I didn't have an assignment. I retired from the MI5 years ago."  
"But why did they give you a known alias?"  
"I don't know for sure. Maybe it was to remind me where I come from and maybe they wanted to keep track of me. Neal, I never thought my past would ever come up again. And I didn't expect to meet you and fall in love with you. I know I should have told you who I really am but I was afraid to lose you since you told me who you are and what you've gone through."  
"So you thought it would be better to deceive me."  
"I didn't want to lose you. And Rachel Turner is more of a ghost than a real person. I never had a real personality. It was like my whole life was planned to make me become an agent like my mother was. Rebecca was an alias I barely used before so it might have been an easy pick for them."  
"Becca,..., Rachel, I don't know if I can forgive you. This happened way too often to me and … it is better if you leave now."  
"Neal,... I know I deceived you but I never lied about my feelings for you. Rebecca Lowe isn't only an alias, I am her, I became her and all she said and felt was genuine."  
"If your feelings were real why did you run away?"  
"That guy I ran into in Frankfurt... he's an old colleague on an assignment there and... it was like my whole past was coming back with a rush. I was afraid they would start targeting me or anyone of you. I panicked and thought it would better to leave."  
"Why did you quit?"  
"They tried to trade my head for treason, selling information and corruption. I was on an assignment in the Middle East to find out if local extremist groups were collaborating with KFOR soldiers. During my investigation I found out that people from my division were involved in it. They covered secretly arms transfer to those terrorists. An encrypted message I sent to another agent was intercepted and they had to get rid of me. A few days later I was arrested in the middle of night, transferred back to England and got charged. When I waited for my hearing and trial my assigned partner came to me and told me he knew that I got framed. He really found evidence for that and so I got out, left the MI5 with the identity of Rebecca Lowe and started the most normal life I could think of until I met you. For the first time in my life I could feel at home, safe and loved. I ran because I thought I would lose all this again."  
"But that explains why you were okay with being on the run. You're used to it."  
"Sadly yes. My family moved every few years. Every time I felt I could settle down somewhere, make friends or lasting relationships of any kind I had to leave again. And when the MI5 recruited me one of the first things I learned was to forget who Rachel Turner was though I never really had a clue who she was or what she wanted. But I know who Rebecca Lowe is and what she wants," she said and buried her head in her hands.  
"Rebecca..."  
When she heard Neal's voice she looked up to him.  
"Why you're still using this name when you're talking to me?"  
"Because it's the only person I know when it comes to you. And Rebecca Lowe is the woman I love and the woman I asked to become my wife."  
"But you can't forgive me."  
"I don't know. When I look at you I thought I see Rebecca Lowe and no one else. And in some point I believe that she's a real person but it's hard to accept that she once had only been an alias."  
"But she's the only person who ever had been able to develop real feelings and relationships and had a real life."  
"I have to think...," Neal said and turned his back to her again. Stiff Rebecca got up with Mozzie's help and they went outside.  
"What shall I do now?"  
"You take a nap now. How long are you up?"  
"Don't know about two days."  
"You know sleep deprivation is a way of torture?"  
"Tell me...," she shivered. Mozzie softly pushed her into the room next to Neal's.  
"Sleep a bit. It will help you to see through."  
"Moz?"  
"Yeah?"  
"Why did you go to find me?"  
Mozzie smiled at her and handed her the bag.  
"Because you two are lost without each other. He loves you. I just need to make him sleep before I remind him about that. You don't have some of those sedatives left?"  
"I am sorry, it was my emergency pack I used on him."  
"How bad. Well I think with a little help of the local pharmacy I can get him to sleep as well."  
"Be careful. I don't want him to be knocked out for days," she said and fell onto the bed only to curl up like a little ball.  
"Don't worry. I know what I am doing."  
"I don't know. You should have let me be."  
"Becca, the fact I found you so easily tells me you are more than just out of training. You ddidn't want to leave. And for an ex agent you are pretty emotional."  
"Thank for reminding me."  
"What did they do to you?"  
"They made me...a machine," Rebecca mumbled more into the pillow.  
Mozzie smiled when he realized she fell asleep. With an amused shake of his head he pulled the covers over her.  
"Sleep well, little lost girl."

Neal still stood in front of the window and looked outside. A part of him wanted Rebecca to be back with him cuddled up to him like she used to. But the bigger part of him was hurt, angry and called him an idiot to believe he ever could have such a luck with a woman. He wanted to believe her but he was too afraid it was just another con she pulled on him. It was common knowledge men get helpless with emotional or crying women and she played that card well if she did so.  
He turned around with the intention to get some early dinner and bumped into Mozzie who was about to knock.  
"What do you want, Moz?"  
"Talk to you."  
"I think I am done with talking."  
"No, we haven't started yet."  
"Moz, I'm not in the mood for it now."  
"Hungry? I got that covered," Mozzie held a bag high which gave a delicious smell.  
"Okay, but no talking."  
"You just need to listen, my friend."  
"I don't want to hear it."  
"Neal, I know you. You are hurt and angry."  
"She said herself only two weeks ago she gave me the impression I made her a second Kate and now this! This is worse than making her like Kate."  
"You think she is a Mata Hari."  
"Yes..."  
"I think she is more the Sidney Bristow kind of girl."  
Neal looked at his friend uncomprehending.  
"What?"  
"You know this tv show "Alias"? Actually there are some frightening similarities. See if she would be that good like you think she is I wouldn't have found her so easily. I pulled everything on her I could find and strangely the MI5 is almost as easy to hack like the Marshal service. They really need an upgrade."  
"You want to help feds?" Neal asked slightly amused.  
"For heaven's sake no. Just mentioned it. What I wanted to tell you. She retired more than 2 years before you met her. The bigger part of what she told you is true. She is really a book scholar. They hired her after her second year. She had to go back to training two times because the higher ups wanted her to be more merciless. In six years of active duty she took a shot at about twenty people but killed only six who were all either suicide bombers or those who attacked her or her colleagues. She did it in self defense."  
"You think this makes it better?"  
"No, but I think it's something you can forgive. In those circles she worked she was a female Ghandi compared to the other agents."  
"So you think we should just kiss and make out? She lied to me for more than a year. I thought I know her."  
To buy time Mozzie gave Neal one of the sandwiches and a bottle of water.  
"No, but answer me one question."  
"What question?"  
"Do you love her?"  
"It's not that easy, Moz. She..."  
"...protected you. Like you wanted to do, remember? Her file tells she really wasn't meant to be an agent. You think we would have had to teach her so much if she would have been so good?"  
"She retired."  
"You never forget those things you know. You know it yourself. Once it became a habit it's hard to lose. And Becca is about to give up. She knows she messed up."  
"We both did. I should have known better," Neal sighed and rubbed his face.  
"You always wear your heart on your sleeve that's why I warned you. I ask you once again, mon frère. Despite what she was do you love her?"  
"Yes."  
"Do you want to try at least to forgive her?"  
"I don't know if I can do it."  
"Neal, she is still the nerdy, sweet, little bit clumsy Becca you know and love. What would you say if she leaves you because of what James did to you?"  
"That's not the same, Moz."  
"In some way it is. You both got used by your parents to achieve their goals and still try to find yourself."  
"That's not true."  
Mozzie raised a knowing eyebrow at Neal and simply looked at him.  
"Ok, maybe a little bit. It turns everything upside down."  
"You turned each other lives upside down a couple of times by now."  
"I am afraid we did it too often. There is no way back," Neal answered with a sad gaze.  
"Ralph Waldo Emerson said: He who is not everyday conquering some fear has not learned the secret of life. You, my friend, didn't conquer your fear today."  
"It's not that easy."  
"It is. Swallow your pride and talk to her honestly. You'll see she is still the same and she probably would plan how to get away from you again if she wasn't sleeping. She is about to lose what she wants the most."  
"What? A normal life?"  
"No, you."  
Neal took a deep breath and wanted to reply when they heard a loud thud. Questioning they looked at each other.  
"I think that came from my room," Mozzie told wondering.  
"Who should be there?"  
"Becca is sleeping there. At least I thought so."  
In a hurry they went over to Mozzie's room. The moment they stepped into it ready for every possible situation from Rebecca packing again to her being attacked they had to laugh when they spotted her on the ground rubbing her head annoyed.  
"Yeah, make fun of the clumsy redhead," she growled and got up to sit on the bed.  
"I guess you had enough sleep?" Mozzie asked still laughing.  
"Woke up..."  
The way she said that told them she woke up because of a nightmare.  
"What happened?" Neal asked a bit worried.  
"Fell out of bed what woke me up."  
"Is there something...?"  
"No, just promise me we eschew the Middle East the next couple of months," she covered her mouth with her hands appalled when she realized she just acted like nothing happened, "I mean … I thought... just forget about it."  
"You remembered what you told me about your last assignment," Neal stated.  
Rebecca nodded while slipping back under the covers cause she felt the urge to hide.  
"I think I get you some coffee before you start sleepwalking and hit your head on the doors," Mozzie snickered and left. When he was gone an uncomfortable silence took place.  
"Neal, I should sleep some more. I haven't slept for two days and..."  
"Becca, don't you think we should talk?"  
"I think you made your point clear. You don't know if you can forgive me and I don't have much hope that you ever will."  
"What do you expect me to do? It was a shock to find out who you really are."  
"So it is more important to you what I was than who I am now? When I retired I was afraid I could never get accustomed to a normal life and my years in the MI5 taught me to be suspicious among other people... I've never fallen in love before. In my former life there was no space for first crushes, high school prom etc. Yes, I had to fake relationships and emotions when I was on assignments but I never did it with you. When we first met at the Gershon I was really that flustered cause it was different. Even if I would have had to I could have never faked any of my feelings for you."  
"You've never fallen in love before?" Neal asked surprised.  
"No. I thought I did but … nothing of it can be compared to be with you. I totally forget everything and was just a normal woman with you."  
"That's the biggest reason you never came clean to me, isn't it?"  
"It is. For the same reason I came with you. I don't mind running as long as you are with me."  
"I don't know what I shall do now, Becca."  
"Me neither. I'll go if you want me to," she told with a lump in her throat.  
"I don't want you to go. Besides you wouldn't survive long when Moz could find you so fast. What did you want to do anyway?"  
"I was on my way to Moscow."  
"Why?"  
"Because the only person from my old life I can trust lives there."  
"Who?"  
"My former partner who cleared me. He retired the same day I did. We have a dead PO box in Moscow in case we ever need the other ones help."  
"You wanted to vanish."  
"I wanted to erase everything about Rachel and Rebecca."  
"Why? You put so much afford in becoming Rebecca."  
"I thought I was better off as a nameless ghost. As long as you don't have a name no one knows you."  
"You wanted to remain nameless? You know that won't work out."  
"I was nameless my whole life. To a name belong stories, a past, a future, dreams and hopes. I never had any of these until..."  
"Until we met?"  
She nodded and sighed heartbreaking.  
"I should have known better."  
"What should you have known better?"  
"You can't start dreaming about a future if you don't have a past. You need a place to come from."  
"I know. It's the same about creating a painting. As long as you don't know who you are your creations lack of soul."  
"Neal?"  
"Yeah?"  
"Do you hate me?"  
"No, I was hurt and a part of me still is. But being with you gave me the impression of a normal life and a normal relationship despite how weird the circumstances are sometimes."  
Neal frowned when Rebecca slightly chuckled.  
"What's up?"  
"It's really ironic that two people like us who have experienced years of loss and deception feel normal with each other."  
"Did you plan to tell me the truth about your past?"  
"Honestly? I got rid of everything that once belonged to Rachel Turner or any other aliases I ever had. I wanted to be no one else than Rebecca Lowe and I still want to be her as I want to be with you."  
"Becca ..."  
"I understand. You don't want me to go cause you doubt I would survive out there on my own but you don't want to be with me any longer. It's okay. I know I messed up."  
Rebecca curled up again like an insecure small girl and turned away from Neal. She thought it had been another mistake in her life to come here to talk to Neal again. She only wanted to cry over everything she lost. Her gaze fell on her engagement ring and she started to pull it off her finger. Suddenly she saw his shadow lingering over her and the next second he put a hand over hers.  
"Don't, Becca."  
"But I don't deserve it anymore."  
Neal softly nudged her to make some space and sat down next to her..  
"You do. You misunderstood me. I don't want you to stay because I think you would be lost without us. I want you to stay with me."  
"Don't play with me."  
"Turn around."  
She shook her head reluctantly.  
"Becca, please..."  
Slowly she turned around but kept her eyes shut. Neal chuckled and bent down to her ears.  
"You aren't a little girl. Please look at me."  
"To take a last look at you? No way."  
"Don't be stupid."  
"Wouldn't be a surprise."  
He shook his head and kissed the top of her nose. Surprised she opened her eyes and expected him to smile at her but Neal just looked at her with this solemn expression.  
"We need to work on our communication I think."  
"Now it's too late for it. The damage is done."  
"Becca, do you want to stay with me?"  
"I don't know..."  
"Why?"  
"I hurt you. I don't want to see it every day in your eyes. We need to trust each other completely if we keep on."  
"Is there anything you want to tell me you didn't?"  
"Just that I should warn you."  
"Warn me?"  
"My dad is with the Army."  
"I think I will survive this. Do you want to get in contact with him when we are back?"  
"No. He won't understand."  
"So you have no one left?"  
"Yes, it's just me."  
"No, it's just us," Neal sheepishly smiled.  
"Are you sure?"  
"I am. I won't say it's all forgiven and forgotten but we can work this out. I love you."  
"I love you too," Rebecca replied shyly, "But I still have to go to Moscow."  
"Why? I thought you wanted to keep your recent identity as Rebecca Lowe."  
"I will but I want him to destroy every left evidence and trace of Rachel Turner. She never was a person that mattered to me and..."  
"Do you want to go alone or should we come with you?"  
"You can join me. Moscow in summer should be really beautiful."  
"So we travel from here to Moscow?"  
"Looks like this."  
"What do you think about moving over to my room?"  
"To do what?"  
"I missed you and it was hard to sleep without you by my side."  
"And if Mozzie returns with the coffee?"  
"Becca, that was only his way to tell us he leaves so we have time to talk."  
"Oh... I must be really confused."  
"I guess so. Come, let's go."  
Neal gently pulled her up and grabbed her hand when they went over to his room. They laid in bed, snuggled up face to face and about to fall asleep any moment.  
"So, the MI5, huh?"  
"Yeah, strange things happen from time to time."  
"Are you okay with it if I call you Jane Bond from time to time?"  
"What? Hey, just because you're overly proud of your old nickname James Bonds... and you know that James Bond had a bad luck with women."  
"I know but you're way too smart for an average Bond girl."  
"I doubt that after..."  
"Becca..."  
"What?"  
"Try to relax. We're here and if I wouldn't want to be with you wouldn't be here."  
"Sorry, I am still confused."  
"It's ok," he stifled a yawn and pulled her closer. She chuckled and buried her head on his shoulder.  
Hours later they got woken up by Mozzie knocking at the door like crazy.  
"Neal! Open up you bullheaded moron! Becca is gone again!" he yelled in full panic. With a groan both got up and Rebecca stumbled towards the door.  
"Shut up Moz and stop worrying!" she shot at him.  
"Oh, you are here."  
"Yes, I am here."  
Neal stepped next to her with a playful smirk.  
"She hadn't much sleep. You know how cranky she can get."  
"Hey, who is the overgrown child?" she said over her shoulder.  
"O-kay, this means you are back on track," Mozzie stated with a happy spark in his eyes.  
"We try," Neal told with his eyes on Rebecca.  
"What about celebrating this? I found this wonderful little restaurant which offers regional cuisine and fantastic wine."  
"Oh please no more wine for Neal."  
"But we all need to eat."  
"We do. Like we all need someone to love," Rebecca agreed with a smile.  
"So, my friends you should get dressed and celebrate."

About one hour later they were ready to leave. When they left the hotel Neal took her hand like they had done so many times before. Neal and Rebecca had to admit that the small restaurant had its own charm and they took a table outside. Even it wouldn't be a good idea they ordered some wine.  
"Hey guys, on our way here I saw a bar which offers a lot of absinthe. Can we please go there after dinner?"  
"Weren't you the one saying much alcohol is a bad choice after the last days?"  
"Oh, come on. It's absinthe, they have over 30 brands. Pretty please?"  
"Hey lady, no need to use your bambi techniques."  
"Okay, okay, you get your trip to that bar."

After dinner and a walk they made it to the bar. Rebecca seemed pretty excited. After Neal and Mozzie had sat down on a comfy couch and an armchair she went to the bar to order.  
"Should it worry me that she's so excited to be here?"  
"Mon frère, you shouldn't be worried but happy she's back."  
After a few minutes Rebecca came back with their drinks.  
"That looks weird," Mozzie said when he looked at the collection of glasses, spoons and carafes with absinthe and water.  
"Don't worry. It's pretty easy. Wait a second, you want to tell me you never had absinthe?"  
"I can't recall but you seem pretty familiar with it."  
"A bit. Okay, you lay that spoon on the glass, put the sugar cube on it and then you let the absinthe rinse over it to melt it. When that is done you fill the rest of the glass with the water."  
"We're not drinking it pure?"  
"Moz, you can try to but I wouldn't do it. That stuff has 55% at least."  
"Oh, okay."  
"For starters I ordered a classic one with the taste of vermouth and anise. If you don't like it they also have several ones without anise cause a lot of people aren't into that flavor."  
While Rebecca prepared her first drink Neal and Mozzie still looked a bit confused and quite worried at their glasses.  
"What is wrong? I'm not trying to poison you. And after being forbidden for over eighty years because people thought you would become crazy if you drink that stuff regularly..."  
"We didn't want to imply that but are you sure this is legal and safe?"  
"Neal, the dose of the neurotoxin Thujon is so small in absinthe today you would rather die from an alcoholic intoxication. Give me your glasses and let me be your green fairy."  
"Ah, I see why you chose the green dress."  
"No, that was just coincidental," Rebecca laughed while she prepared the other two glasses.  
"But if those green fairies would be so beautiful as you are I understand why people are drinking so much of it."  
Rebecca slightly blushed.  
"That will never fade as one of your habits, huh?" Neal teased her while nuzzling her cheek with his nose.  
"I'm not good dealing with compliments and I'm afraid I never will."  
"Like I said a lousy agent."  
"And glad about it."  
"So am I," Mozzie cheered and took his glass. Neal and Rebecca followed his example and held their glasses high.  
"To a new beginning." Neal toasted.  
"And to us." Rebecca added.  
"And to more mischief."  
"Mozzie!" both scolded him.  
"What? Isn't it what we are up to?"


	6. Conversation over vodka

_Here the next part. Yeah we aren't done with the MI5 history yet. Our creativity sort of went into deep sleep after the disappointing season final regarding Rebecca. _

_Non the less no have fun. And don't forget to review._

* * *

It was their second day in Moscow and shortly after their arrival Rebecca had placed a message for her former partner from the MI5 in that dead P.O. Box. They were strolling through the city and did some sightseeing when she received a message on her smart phone.  
"Who was it?" Neal asked.  
"Michael, my former partner. We meet for dinner tonight at 7 pm. Seems like he had opened up a restaurant with his wife."  
"A restaurant run by a former MI5 agent? I hope we won't get sedated and kidnapped," Mozzie added with a hint of suspicion.  
"Moz, don't worry. As I said before he retired he same day I did. But I never knew he had a thing for cooking. We will see..."  
"And you're sure it's okay if we tag along with you?"  
"It is. In my message I said I wouldn't be coming alone."  
"How do you know it is his restaurant?"  
"Because the message said we meet at our restaurant so..."  
"Yeah, that makes sense. Do you know if his wife is a Russian?"  
"I guess so. But I haven't seen him in years so I don't know much. Let's just continue with our tour and have a nice dinner tonight."  
"We will..."

In the evening they were standing in front of the small familiar looking restaurant.  
"Looks they're offering traditional Russian cuisine."  
"And a lot of vodka," Neal said with a worried look on the menu.  
"Awww, poor baby. You survived really good our absinthe encounter in Budapest."  
"Yeah, and I remember it was you frolicking around on our way back pretending you're the green fairy."  
"Very funny."  
"Just the truth."  
"Let's go inside."  
The second they went through the door they felt the warm and familiar atmosphere.  
"Rebecca!"  
A man who was about 5 years older than Rebecca came towards them with a broad smile and pulled her into a hug.  
"Michael, so nice to see you again. Can't believe you became a chef. Never knew you had a soft spot for cooking."  
"I have to admit I only run the place, my wife Elena is ruling over the kitchen."  
"Ah, that makes sense. May I introduce you to my friends Neal Caffrey and..."  
"Dante Haversham," Mozzie interrupted her.  
"Mozzie..., you can live out your paranoia on another day. Michael, I have to excuse my friend. His name is Mozzie, shortly for Mozart and I'm afraid that's all you ever know."  
"Nice to meet you all. Follow me to your table."  
"Thank you. Are we too early? It isn't very crowded here."  
"I left a notice on the door that we're closed today because we have a private event. I thought you wouldn't love to talk about the old times with too many people around."  
"That's true."  
They sat down at a table in the back of the restaurant. Only a moment later a black haired woman about Rebecca's age came in with a tray laden with soup, bread and the feared vodka. She smiled curious at Rebecca.  
"So you are the old friend Mikhail is so excited about?" she said with a heavy Russian accent.  
"Elena, meet Rebecca. And these are her friends Neal and Mozzie."  
"You don't look like agents," Elena said towards the men.  
"Oh, we are far from this!" Neal laughed.  
"So who are your friends, Becky?" Michael teased her.  
"Urgh... seriously?"  
"What? I remember you liked it."  
"I didn't!"  
"I think this calls for the first toast," Elena stepped in and poured everyone a glass of vodka.  
"To old and new friends!" Michael cheered and everyone downed the shot. Only Neal hesitated a moment worrying how this would end.  
"Why did you call her Becky?" Mozzie asked more curious than suspicious.  
"She didn't tell you?"  
"No..."  
"Oh please Mick, this story is so stupid. Don't tell it."  
"I am sorry he asked. Okay, so the first assignment we had to go undercover together was the only time she used this name before. We had to play newlyweds on their honeymoon to meet with our contact person in France. The guy had some information about a act of terrorism against the British airports."  
"Yeah and the moment we arrived in Lyon he had nothing better to do than calling me Becky all the time like a stupid love sick little boy."  
"But it was plausible."  
"And you remember how I payed back for it?"  
"Uhm..."  
"What did you do?" Neal asked amused.  
"I made sure he had the worst hangover of his lifetime."  
"What ended up in a two day delay of our assignment because no one of us was able to walk straight. But that was nothing compared to what she did to others."  
"You mean the itching powder in my handler's clothes because he said I should quit being Mother Theresa and start to be more like the Terminator?"  
"For example."  
"Seems like I'm not the only one who loved to annoy the one in charge," Neal snickered.  
"You aren't. Peter would have started to fear me if we had stayed."  
"I think Neal managed to get him used to a lot of things," Mozzie added.  
"But we should talk less and start to eat. The soljanka isn't getting better."  
"Exactly what I wanted to say," Elena laughed, "But tell me Rebecca, why did you come here? Mikhail told me about the dead PO box and why you have it."  
"It's a long story."  
"You know Russians love long stories accompanied by good food and vodka. And we have plenty of both."  
"I was afraid she would say that," Neal groaned much to Mozzie's delight.  
"You don't know how to cherish this gracious offer, mon frère."  
"I can only think about the hangover we all will have."  
"Don't worry, Neal. If you only drink vodka you will feel fine tomorrow," Elena tried to assure him.  
"I hope so. He can get really grumpy when he has a hangover."  
"Let's not worry tonight. Just enjoy your food. Unfortunately I have to take care of the other meals."  
"If they're just half as good as the Soljanka you will have a hard time to make us leave."  
When Elena was back in the kitchen Michael looked thoughtful at Rebecca.  
"So, what can I do for you? I guess you didn't want to meet out of sentimental reasons."  
"No, so nice it is to see you again but there is a reason."  
"Are you in trouble?"  
"No, not really. Look, since I retired I lived as Rebecca Lowe and this former alias became my real life."  
"So you want to get rid of anything regarding Rachel Turner or any other alias if there is something left?"  
"That's why I loved working with you. That's exactly what I need."  
"I understand. I even thought of this since you signed your message with your alias. I will do whatever I can. So I guess you do this because of your new life with Neal."  
"How...?"  
"Before you walked in here you were holding hands outside and every time before you look at him your gaze wanders off to your engagement ring."  
"Still analyzing everything."  
"And you're still lousy in watching your own actions."  
"So she wasn't that good as an agent?" Mozzie asked because he knew it was one of the things that Neal wanted to know but didn't dare to ask.  
"Well, it depends on how you see it. Does she still get flustered easily?"  
"Oh yes," Neal and Mozzie replied.  
"So there you have your answer. Would someone suspect a woman to be an agent if she behaves like that?"  
"Not at all."  
"And that's why they loved to send me with a male partner as newlyweds or couple on vacation."  
"Poor sweetheart," Neal smiled at her teasing. Michael started to laugh.  
"That you dare to do this tells me she didn't get back on you by now."  
"No, she didn't."  
"Well, you know they might go after you if I do this?"  
Rebecca sighed and nodded.  
"Yeah but I am prepared. I still need some stuff but..."  
"And she isn't alone in this," Mozzie said seriously.  
"I see. So tell me how did all this happen?"  
"Well, Neal isn't just a simple man," she started and rolled her eyes when her former partner smirked at her.  
"I could tell."  
"Actually we are on the run because of me."  
"Since I know her disgust for everything that has to do with firearms you won't be an assassin or something else and the way you behave tells me you aren't military so... I would bet on conman or thief, maybe forger."  
Mozzie, Neal and Rebecca looked at each other snickering.  
"All of it."  
"You are kidding me, Rebecca."  
"No, I am not."  
Michael leaned back in his chair and shook his head amused.  
"I know a normal man would bore you to death but this is great."  
"I didn't know he was one. I just knew he was working with the FBI."  
"You were a CI then?"  
"Yeah but you know those things don't work out most of the times."  
"Who?" Michael asked.  
"Who what?" Mozzie panicked again.  
"Who came back from your old life to make you run?"  
"Someone who isn't an issue anymore."  
Surprised Neal looked at Mozzie.  
"What do you know?"  
"Just something about a revolt in the very prison our "friend" spent time. Some psycho did us a favor."  
"Mozzie...," Rebecca said in a threatening voice.  
"I had nothing to do with it," he held his hands up in defense, "It happened two months ago. How should I have done that?"  
"Yeah, we were busy with other things," Neal thought aloud.  
"See!"  
"But what did you mean with they will come after her, Michael?" Neal asked.  
"They let us go under the condition they could reactivate us whenever they need us. If I erase everything that doesn't belong to the name Rebecca Lowe the agency will hunt her because they think she is a rogue agent."  
"But if they keep track of her why didn't they come after us already?"  
"Because she didn't burn her real identity," Mozzie said knowing, "As long as there is nothing that makes them think she turned her back on them they let her do what she want."  
"Not really."  
"What do you mean?"  
"They surely kept track of me. The way they think I am sure they wait for the moment my connection to you will be useful for them," Rebecca admitted through gritted teeth.  
"That's why you wanted to leave?"  
"It came to my mind after I left."  
"You never thought of it before?" Michael asked astonished.  
"No, everything happened so fast and I didn't waste a single thought on all this after I settled down."  
Elena came back with another full tray and stopped a few steps away.  
"Looks like a bad topic."  
"Not really, Len."  
She put the tray down and pulled Rebecca up.  
"You come with me and we get you some dessert to cheer you up."  
"But ..."  
"Nah, don't."  
Under amused giggles Rebecca got pulled towards the kitchen. Elena dragged her towards the huge fridge.  
"Elena, you don't need to do this."  
"I do. You look like you need to get cheered up. What did Mikhail do?"  
"Nothing, he just reminded me of something."  
"You didn't think about the danger to bring Neal into your life?"  
"He was so worried about me being in danger because of his life."  
"You love each other. That's all that counts."  
"Is it enough for you and Mick?"  
Elena giggled and got some chocolate pudding for them.  
"I can't say I was happy about his past but I love him."  
"When did he tell you?"  
"The moment he asked me to marry him."  
"You are kidding me."  
"No. He said he needs to tell me something and after he finished he asked me to become his wife."  
"And what did you do?"  
"Slapped him and didn't talk to him for two weeks. And from the look you wear you go through a similar time."  
"Neal knows for less than two weeks."  
"But he is with you."  
"Because Mozzie kicked our asses till we came back to our senses and talked."  
"Smart man. And here we go. Enjoy your pudding."  
Elena held a small bowl with the pudding which was decorated with nuts, whipped cream and caramel sauce.  
"Looks like a big try to cheer me up!" Rebecca laughed.  
"You could say so. So how did you and Neal meet?"  
"We met because he had to steal something from the museum I was working at that time."  
"What? Really?"  
"Yeah, he stole my key card to get access and how surprising I got interrogated by the FBI but it's a way too long story and it's a bit more than just complicated."  
"Are you staying a bit longer here?"  
"Don't know. We planned to stay here for 4 days. Why?"  
"You look like you haven't had a girls day in ages."  
"Only on my own. Last one I had was in Paris on that day when Neal proposed to me."  
"Oh gosh, that must have been so romantic."  
"It was. He organized a very private dinner in the Jardins du Tulieres and after dinner he asked me to become his wife."  
Rebecca had to chuckle when Elena squealed.  
"This is so cute. And it's obvious to see you love each other."  
"So strange it sounds but Neal is the first guy I've ever been in love with."  
"Really? Why?"  
"Did Mick tell you something about me?"  
"We talked about you when I wanted to know why he retired. He told me that you never had a life of your own that you should have become an agent because your mom was one."  
"That's true and because of my dad being in the army we moved regularly."  
"So you never had real friendships or relationships?"  
"No, not until I met Neal and fell in love with him. And that's why I couldn't tell him who I really am. Now I'm afraid that my past will get in the way when Mick destroys everything regarding my real identity."  
"I'm sure they will find a way to keep you safe."  
"Aren't you afraid that they might try to reactivate him?"  
"He's so close to being retired. It wouldn't benefit them at all."

Meanwhile in the dining area.  
"Is there anything we can do to prevent Rebecca from being hunted down by the MI5?" Mozzie asked.  
"Not sure."  
"There must be something. If they go after her she will run without us and I don't want to imagine what they will do if they find her," Neal sounded more than worried.  
"Let me think about it."  
"I don't think we have much time. Becca ran into one of her former colleagues when we were in Frankfurt. So what you've been telling us is that either she keeps her real identity and the MI5 might want to reactivate her when they think she's useful for them or you delete every single piece of Rachel Turner and they will go after her because they think she went rogue," Neal's voice was a mixture between frustration and despair.  
"What if we can create something that would make it completely impossible to work for them anymore?"  
"What do you mean, Moz?"  
"Something like a psychological disease like a post-traumatic stress disorder. It would be possible after what happened to her."  
"They would sent her to a psychological evaluation and she isn't good in faking a psychological disease," Michael explained also frustrated.  
"They won't let her go until she is dead, will they?"  
"It's the only way they will let anyone go for real."  
"That's it!" Mozzie proclaimed excited.  
"What?"  
"She has to die! I mean not for real but for the MI5."  
"Like you died after the FBI found you."  
"That could work but it has to be plausible for them."  
"She got framed right?" Mozzie asked.  
"Yeah, by her mentor. Why?"  
"How long ago?"  
"More than 3 years ago. Why?"  
"If you would go after the one who framed you what would you do?"  
"Take my time to gather information, activate old contacts, make a damn good plan."  
"And this will take years if you are on the other side of the planet."  
"Especially when you were a field agent and not an analyst."  
"Michael there is one thing I want to know before we go further into planning," Neal started. Mozzie got up and stretched his limbs.  
"I take a look how Becca is doing."  
Neal nodded thankful and turned to Michael again.  
"You want to know about the kills she had to execute."  
"Yes."  
"Neal, even if she was the best at the shooting range she hated to shoot at people. But I know back in Lebanon before she got framed her shot saved not only me but also a women's center full with women and children of all ages. A lot of them were refugees from Iraq. I think no matter what happened she would have wanted to retire after that."  
"Why?"  
"The suicide bomber was a 15 years old boy."  
"It was a kid?"  
"Unfortunately a common thing in those areas. She was always protective about children because of her own childhood and it was the first time she ran into such a young suicide bomber. We met before she ran and she said she is happy to leave this nightmare behind."  
"How can she be so happy and carefree after all this?"  
"My guess?" Michael asked and looked behind him to see of the others were coming back.  
"Yes."  
"I think she completely dissociated from Rachel. She is a different person. I never saw her so normal, joking around and happy."  
"Do you think we should let it be that way?"  
"You are afraid this will come back to her one day."  
"I do. Until two weeks ago I was afraid she would suffer from a late impact of PTSD because of her kidnapping and being shot before we ran but now..."  
"You worry even more if those things she experienced will come back."  
"I do."  
"What happened she got kidnapped?"  
"A former rival I helped to get behind bars came after me. He blackmailed me and when he thought I needed a little "encouragement" he kidnapped her. At the exchange he shot her just to make me suffer. But I guess this was nothing compared to what she had to do while being an active agent even if she had nightmares for some time."  
"She is strong."  
"I know," Neal said with a proud smile.  
"And she really loves you otherwise she wouldn't have brought you here and asked me to do all this."  
"For some time I wasn't sure about it. I doubted her after she told me."  
"Elena didn't speak to me for two weeks after I told her."  
"But now you are married."  
"And the happiest guy on earth. Except for you perhaps."  
"We are in an exclusive club."  
"We surely are," Michael smiled solemnly.  
"Michael, why did they send her with other agents?"  
"They didn't trust her. Her profile said she could be uncontrollable when she gets emotional and she surely does but that made her less reliable. She only got the assignments to gather information or be a bodyguard."  
"And when you had to pose as newlyweds how...?"  
"How far it went? Let me put it that way, Neal. There was almost a fifty fifty quota and it wasn't unusual to send a male and a female agent together as a couple. I know a lot of former colleagues who used this to vent off but she never did it. You can picture what the rumors were because of this."  
"Everyone thought she is into women."  
"They did. We worked a lot together. I don't know why but we had this mutual understanding from the start and the higher ups used this."  
"That's why you know so much."  
"I do. I even know things neither her parents nor her mentor nor her handler know," Michael chuckled. Neal's eyes lit up in curiosity.  
"Like?"  
"Like she finally had her rebellious phase during her college time She used the time she was free from her home and before they hired her."  
"She tried to make all the experiences she couldn't have before."  
"How do you know?"  
"She isn't the only one with a messed up crazy childhood."  
"I understand. Seems like people like us either become criminals or cops or agents."  
"Or start as one and end up one of the other two."  
"A true word. And I think we should rescue Rebecca before Elena starts to feed her with the whole storage room. She can be really a mother hen."  
"I think after the last week she won't mind someone clucking over her."

At the same time Rebecca sat at a table and ate her pudding while Mozzie tasted his way through the dishes Elena prepared for them.  
"You think it was a good idea to let them talk?" Rebecca asked worried and looked in direction of the dining area.  
"I am. Neal needs answers only Michael can give him."  
"But he could ask me."  
Elena and Mozzie shot her a doubting look.  
"Would you answer him?" the Russian asked.  
"I don't know. I think it depends on the question."  
"See, that's what I mean."  
"Here drink. Calms your nerves," Elena said and gave her another vodka.  
"You know vodka and chocolate are great things to cheer a woman up."  
"I hope you are still hungry after it."  
"With this delicious smell I am starving. What are you cooking?"  
"Pelmeni, people say it's Russian tortellini."  
"I love pasta."  
"Mikhail told me. And you need strength now."  
"That's true. We still need to make a plan how to free you from this spying octopus of doom," Mozzie added seriously.  
"Octopus of doom? How many shots did you have?" Rebecca asked giggling.  
"Not more than you."  
"Seems like you already had enough. Octopus of doom... sounds like a machine of a Marvel villain."  
"Would be great. I always thought Dr. Octavius needed some pet," Mozzie said burning for this little stupid idea.  
"This can't be true..."  
"What can't be true?" Neal asked from the door and went to her.  
"Mozzie has weird ideas. Even for him."  
"I doubt that," he interjected and stole her spoon to get some pudding.  
"He has. He referred the MI5 to an octopus of doom."  
"Because they are everywhere like tentacles."  
"Actually the idea isn't so bad," Michael laughed.  
"You heard that?"  
"We did, Moz," both said amused.  
"So you got your answers?" she asked frightened.  
"I do and I think we need a damn good plan to free you... both."  
"What?" Michael asked confused.  
"Michael, if you help us with this why don't make sure they won't come after you too?"  
"That's a good idea," Rebecca was all into it, "Without you I would rot in the Tower right now."  
"You know they don't use it as prison anymore."  
"I know. I wanted to emphasize the meaning of what you did."  
"Before you start to plan go back into the dining room. This is a kitchen not a conference room," Elena hushed them out again.  
"Whatever you want," Michael chuckled and gave her a kiss before he followed his guests. Mozzie poured all of them another vodka. Neal was the first one who took it.  
"Did Moz tell you about our idea?"  
"No, he only said there is one," Rebecca looked back and forth between them.  
"The plan is to fake your death," Mozzie explained shortly.  
"To fake my death? Are you crazy?"  
"No, I am not."  
"And what happens to my actual life if we kill her?" she asked annoyed.  
"Damn...," Michael hit the the table, "I forgot they connected each other."  
"They did what?"  
"To make sure I won't vanish they connected each other. If Rachel Turner dies Rebecca Lowe will too," she explained frustrated and on the brink of crying.  
"And I had such a nice idea," Mozzie pouted.  
"Sorry, Moz, seems like your fire bug has to go back to sleep," Neal said sympathetically.  
"Means we need to find another way."  
"Still looking for an idea?" Elena asked.  
"Unfortunately yes," Neal admitted. The black haired woman sat down with them and looked at Michael.  
"Mikhail, what about those documents you keep?"  
"What documents?" their guests asked surprised.  
"Those you keep in the safe you think I don't know of which is hidden behind the ugly painting."  
"That's modern art."  
"Looks like my paintings when I was a little girl."  
Neal and Mozzie chuckled but Rebecca looked at her former colleague through narrowed eyes.  
"What did you keep?"  
"It started as some kind of insurance."  
"What started?" Mozzie became suspicious again.  
"When I looked for evidence to clear Rebecca I stumbled over a couple of retired agents who got retired under strange circumstances."  
"What kind of circumstances?" Rebecca asked curious.  
"All of them got charged for selling information or corruption before they got retired. I talked to one of them and he helped me to clear you. I am still in contact with him. He created some kind of network of retired agents to keep each other safe. No one knows more than two of those inside the network."  
"No one except?" Neal inquired.  
"No one except him and me."  
"That's what you kept and you use that PO box not only for me," Rebecca smiled with an evil gleam in her eyes.  
"Not all of the documents are here. I spread it. Some are in safe deposits, some at home."  
"They all got retired after someone tried to frame them?"  
"Yes, Rebecca."  
"Who?"  
"I don't know. There were always different people who ended up being sacrificed. What ever is going on there it goes up to the really high persons in charge."  
"You are speaking of a conspiracy up into the political ranks."  
"Oh this is great!" Mozzie cheered. Michael looked at him bewildered.  
"Don't worry, he loves conspiracy theories," Neal told snickering.  
"And this now proves me right!".  
"I know, Moz but back to the topic. Can we use this somehow?"  
"Use?" Michael repeated thinking, "Maybe we can really use this but I need to contact some people."  
"What do you think about?"  
"Maybe we can use this to make sure no one of us has to come back to that life."  
"How many are in this network?" Neal asked.  
"Since it started five years ago it grew to 17 people. If we count Rebecca too we are 18."  
"A lot of mind force," Rebecca wondered.  
"A lot of people with old connections that still work," Michael added.  
"And a lot of people who can trade in favors."  
"You think we have a chance?"  
"If all of them take part."  
"Do we really want to shake up the MI5?" Neal asked unsure.  
"Of course we do!" Mozzie answered being happy about discovering a real conspiracy.  
"And everyone will be just a normal person afterwards?" Elena asked excited.  
"That's what we want to achieve."  
Neal started to smile also excited.  
"What's up, Neal?" Rebecca wondered.  
"I think it's time to live up to the nickname Peter gave me."  
"Oh dear Lord, we are doomed!" Mozzie threw his hand in the air.  
"Which nickname?"  
"Every case and every culprit gets a nickname and Neal was convicted for bond forgery and so he got the nickname James Bonds."  
"Seriously?" Michael and Elena blinked in surprise.  
"Yes."  
"Don't say anything about it. It would flatter his ego more than it already does."  
"It doesn't!"  
"Oh come on, darling. You were grinning like the Chesire Cat when you told me about it," Rebecca interjected, "but what are we going to do now?"  
"I suggest the three of you visit us at home tomorrow and I show the you the information I gathered over the years."  
"Sounds like a good idea."  
"And for the rest of tonight we just celebrate our gathering here with food and drinks," Elena chimed in to finally put some plates down.  
"Oh, sorry, how could we ever miss such a great opportunity."  
"Don't try to get any pelmenis. They're all mine," Rebecca claimed.  
"You don't want to negotiate? What about blinis in exchange for some pelmenis?"  
"No..."  
They all chuckled when Rebecca dug into her plate while falling silent for the next few minutes.  
"It was always the same with her. As soon as Rebecca found traditional local cuisine she used the first opportunity to go there," Michael smirked.  
"Hey, you have to know your enemies very well," Rebecca interjected without looking up from her plate.  
"By raiding storage rooms and restaurant kitchens?"  
"I wanted to learn as much as possible and who knows maybe I'll write an international restaurant guide when I'm old and bored."  
"Like you will ever get bored."  
"Not in a lifetime when she is with Neal." Mozzie giggled.  
"Hey!" both disagreed at the same time.

It was early morning when Mozzie, Neal and Rebecca wobbled back to their hotel. There had been a lot of vodka the last hours and at some point Elena started to teach Mozzie Russian drinking songs much to the other ones amusement.  
Giggling Rebecca slipped out of her shoes and clothes and crawled into the bed. Neal dropped next to her with a satisfied and happy smile.  
"You're ok?" he asked.  
"I am," she snickered, "I am excited. If this works out I will be free. For real."  
"I know what you mean. Two more years and we can go back and live normal."  
She snuggled up close and kissed his nose.  
"I know and I am looking forward to it."  
"You think this will work?"  
"Neal, if anyone can put a plan together to make this work I guess it will be Michael and Mozzie."  
"You trust them a lot."  
"I do. But tell me what did you ask Michael?"  
"Who says I did ask him something?"  
"Moz..."  
Neal closed his eyes and smiled.  
"For someone so paranoid like him he is too talkative sometimes."  
"Why didn't you ask me?" Rebecca asked hurt.  
"I don't want to make you feel bad and I guess you wouldn't have answered all of my questions."  
"Like?"  
"You really want to know, don't you?" he teased her and pulled the covers tighter around them.  
"I do."  
"You said you had no chance to have a normal life with boyfriends and proms but I could tell I wasn't the first man you were with and …"  
"Gosh, you thought Mick and I ...?" she started to laugh, "Oh gosh, that's great. Neal, I never would have ended up with him like you never would have tried something with Elizabeth."  
"Oh..."  
"He is more like a brother or cousin, you know?"  
"I am sorry."  
"You were curious. I understand but to answer your question in a way he can't. I easily learn and I learn fast. I used this skill for my advantage and being a little wild during college. That was all."  
"Wild? Like spring break in Fort Lauderdale wild?"  
"Wild like we spent spring break in Tijuana."  
"You spent spring break in Mexico?"  
"Yes, but don't make me ever take part in a tequila drinking competition. The worst hangover ever."  
"But you stopped all of that when the MI5 hired you."  
"It's easy to suppress your needs if you are used to this for your whole life. Mozzie knows what I am talking about."  
"Why him?"  
"Ok, have you ever seen him taking a closer look at a woman?"  
"No."  
"That's what I mean. He barely let those kind of needs run free. Fortunately he is in the lucky position to let them run free whenever he wants. I had to suppress them for years."  
"And after you retired?"  
"I had a hard time to become normal to let go of my trained suspicions and readiness. I enjoyed the freedom and I mean you know me. I am shy when it comes to relationships."  
"I don't remember you being shy when you stayed over night," Neal smirked smugly.  
"Idiot," she shot back.  
"Not at all."  
"I know," she yawned and buried her face in the crook of his shoulder.  
"Goodnight, Becca."  
"Nite..."  
Content he pulled her as close as possible and wrapped his arms around her. Somehow Neal had the feeling he had to protect her from everything.

Rebecca sat on Neal's lap and looked with him through the documents Michael gave them. Mozzie looked through the other ones while Michael impatiently waited for a reaction from his contact while Elena was in the kitchen busy with cooking. It was surprising for them that their hosts had closed their restaurant for that evening but they appreciated it a lot.  
"This is a lot of information," Mozzie said surprised.  
"We used every chance to get some pieces. We can trace it up to a couple of handlers who strangely got arrested and charged every time we came close."  
"Like pawns. Means we look for the royal duo," Mozzie nodded to himself.  
"If the handlers are just pawns it means it goes up to at least the head of the agency," Rebecca frowned.  
"If not to a former Prime Minister," Michael sighed.  
"This will end up as a big mess if any of this sees the light of day," Neal stated.  
"It will. That's how we can blackmail them."  
"We keep shut about it and they don't come after anyone. Nice deal. But we need proof for everything," Rebecca summed it up.  
"That's the plan but it will take some time. They are all spread all over the world and some have families now. We can only ignite this but have to be patient for the outcome."  
"How long?" Neal asked unhappy.  
"Six months at least. Maybe longer."  
"I think I can built up a faster system to deliver news and mails than this ancient dead PO box system you use," Mozzie mumbled already with his laptop in front of him.  
"How?"  
"Secure e-mail accounts with an irregular changing encryption algorithm just for the start. With everyone spread over the world all this can get faster with this."  
"You think this works?" Michael asked skeptical.  
"It will. I promise."  
"And you're sure you want to do this?"  
"I am. I want to be no one else anymore than just Rebecca Lowe. Neal and I want to have children someday and I don't want to risk that my old life as Rachel Turner will get in the way some day."  
"Okay, then we will do everything to make that happen."  
"I think this deserves a toast before we have dinner," Elena said and brought a bottle of vodka and glasses.  
"So, to what will we drink?" Rebecca asked.  
"To the success of our plan!"  
"I drink to that no matter how long it takes!"  
5 persons clinked their glasses smiling at each other encouraging.


End file.
